Week 24 – Going It Alone

This journey has been amazing. I have traveled it with many like-minded folks,  it in reality I have traveled it alone.

That’s perfectly fine with me, because we are ultimately alone all of our lives. And guess what? I am okay with that. Traveling on this journey alone and together has made me more connected and more understanding of what and who I am. I know now what I want, and when I want it by. I know how I am going to do it. But it willl require focus and discipline and working on me each and every day.

My future posts will reflect more on topics to help others, because that seems to fuel me.

If you would like to experience this journey in your future, just reach out to me here and I will make sure to let you know when the next workshop begins. Hint, hint, it’s only offered once a year.

Stay well. Love yourself. Because in the end your life is truly mind over matter.

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Week 23 – Failing to Succeed

Are you this person?

The one who never succeeds? Who always fails? Did you know it’s easier to succeed then to fail?

It’s true. We fail ourselves by feeding our minds with all those negative thoughts and fears and doubts. We fail ourselves because we let others influence what our gut is telling us to do. We fail ourselves because we truly don’t have the true mindset that success is something we should have.

We are always looking to validate our own success through other people’s eyes. The only person that you really need to have validate your success, is you.

Let’s face it when we do something half-baked in life, we know it. Yet, we try to convince ourselves we did our very best.

As a Personal Trainer, I see this all the time when I am training clients. Before they start an exercise, they have already created doubt that they can finish or the pain they might have to go through. Instead of becoming determined and believing in themselves, they come up with all sorts of excuses and reasons they can’t do a particular exercise.

It is fantastic to witness is when that switch is turned on.

Which brings me to one of my clients who I will call April. April joined me last September in a group fitness class. The very first day, she nearly passed out and had to sit down. She told me she couldn’t breathe, her feet and knees bothered her. I didn’t expect to see her return after that. But the next week she was back and I only heard her complain and worry once or twice. She still had to sit down and rest but she started to believe in herself. I kept telling her “you can do it”, “you got this” “I know you are strong” “I believe in you”

Fast forward 9 months later. Now I call April the Beast! She comes to class with gusto, never misses a training session and even helps others. Even her friends have noticed the changes. She is getting that validation from the outside, but the real validation is watching her in action. She believes in herself.

You see April didn’t believe. It was easier for her to worry, fear and excuse herself then to embrace success. The transformation was and is amazing to watch. It’s why I love what I do and I continue to be passionate about getting people to move. It’s the reasons I pursued my dream of become a Personal Trainer later in life because I knew I could help others.

So the next time you are trying something new, or jumping outside of your comfort zone, remember to turn that belief switch on. What we think will manifest and it’s easier then you think.

Succcess is easy if you just let it in.

 

Week 22 – Turning Negative into Positive

We often associate emotions and feelings that are highly charged as being a negative part of our life.

Think about it. Have you ever gotten so angry at something or someone that you want to scream. Or you do? Do you find that you spend days riddled over guilt because you said or did something that hurt someone’s feelings. Was there a time you didn’t feel good enough or unworthy of something or someone?

It turns out all of these charged up feelings can help you in a positive way.

They create action or energy inside of you and lead you to where you need or want to go.

Now I’m not saying everyone should go out and yell at someone else. Or make them feel badly. Or feel regret or guilt. But there is something to be learned in every situation you encounter and every relationship you have.

Think about it. When you are frightened of something, do you think about anything else? Definitely not. You are single focused without any distractions in your thinking. Imagine if you can use that same thought process to do something you want to do. So fear shows us how we can be laser focused on one thing. And then there’s my personal favorite, guilt. Guilt actually shows how to make ammends and then we modify how we behave. And that’s all good.

So looking at each and every feeling or emotion we have can actually help us and change the way we act. And turn a negative action, feeling or thought into a postive outcome and step towards a better you.

The next time you are highly charged or feeling blue. Try to turn that feeling into something positive. You will be amazed by where the journey can take you.

 

Week 21 – The Power of Today

Why are you worrying about tomorrow? Why are you fretting over yesterday.

The power of your life is the moment right in front of you. Every single minute counts and most of us don’t appreciate it nor use it to the fullest. We are caught up in the minutes of overthinking, old habits or even worse worrying about something or someone that we can’t control.

Instead of spending all the wasted moments on things that are done or haven’t happened or someone else, refocus your time on you.

It’s so simple, most people don’t even understand it. If you spend time enjoying the moment, or day, you will be so much happier and at peace.

I didn’t believe it could happen. But now that I have spent over 20 weeks working on my thinking and understanding what a waste of time all of “if only…” or “I hope…” time, I just enjoy the day and the moment that is right in front of me. Who knows, it could very well be my last moment or day. And wouldn’t it be a shame if I didn’t take full advantage of it?

So ask yourself, what are you wasting your time on? Or who are you wasting yout time on? If you can simply redirect your energy to being in the moment, everything around you gets better and easier too.

If you’re going to see family, instead of falling into the old traps and relationships, really enjoy the good moments, the stories and the love. If you have a new stressful job, find the fun in the learning. If you are working out, see what you can do to get further then before.

Stay present. Focus on what’s right in front of you. And you will find every day is full of love and miracles

Peace and happiness. Enjoy the journey.

 

Week 20 – The Will To Succeed

We all want to succeed.

But what does that really mean? And how do you get there? And how is it measured?

First let’s define what will means. Having the will is having passion about something. Not only do you believe it with everything, but you are driven to action. People today that are successful, don’t just get there by chance or luck. Well, maybe a few do. But that’s not the norm. Most people have to work at it. In other words having the will means taking the action necessary to acheive what you want or need.

Having the will = action you have taken.

Think about someone who excels as an athlete. He/She didn’t just decide to be a 400 metre track star. They had to work at it day after day after day. When their friends were out wasting time on their cell phones or gabbing with friends, they were running, sprinting, stretching and had razor-sharp focus on what success looked like to them. Getting the edge, or being successful boiled down to less then a second for their success! The difference between the win, or just finishing.

So the end game is having the will to succeed is NOT enough. You also have to take the necessary action to acheive the results you dream about every day.

You are not entitled to play the blame game about your lack of success. If you are really, really honest with yourself you will discover where and what you didn’t do and what you need to do better.

It doesn’t mean you can’t be happy. Just don’t be the person who cries when you aren’t where you want to be. There are plenty of happy people who don’t have the will.

So pick a goal you are passionate about, get disciplined, focus, think it, breathe it and imagine it all the time. Create the will, take the action and get the passion inside of you and you will succeed.

Week 19 – How to Follow Your Bliss

Have you found your bliss?

Many of us never find bliss. And that’s very sad, because finding it will make you content. Being content and really loving who you are, what you do and whom you do it with will change everything in your life.

Ask yourself what really makes you feel alive? It is spending time outside on a hike? Spending time with your family members? Doing a Spartan Race? Or expressing yourself creatively?

You see we are all very different. The experiences or things in life that make us truly content and happy are unique to us. None of us are the same. We don’t walk or talk the same way. We don’t think the same way. So why would we find bliss the same way?

I can tell you one thing. Most of us never even experience bliss.

We get side-tracked by acheivements or owning something or even a fabulous vacation to some place even more fabulous. It is not any of that which makes you content. It’s the deep breath you take when you watch the waves crash on the ocean, or the rain hitting the rooftop in a summer rainful. It’s the first cup of coffee in the morning. It’s reading a great book or listening to awesome music.

I have a top-ten list of the things or experiences that make me really happy and at peace. One of my top-ten, is drinking my morning coffee at our lake home on the back deck. Another is driving my convertible with the top down by myself with the music cranking while I drive a country road. You get the idea.

When I’m having a stressful day or time, I try to imagine myself in one of those places and it calms me right down. I don’t even have to be there. Just thinking about it and feeling the feelings works wonders.

So dig deep, and find out what makes you truly happy and at peace. Once you do, make sure you do more of that and less of the stuff that you don’t enjoy. Once you find your bliss, follow it. I know that’s where I will be today and in the future.

 

 

 

Week 18 – The Honest Truth

So the question you need to ask yourself is how honest are you when it comes to you?

It’s an interesting question. And it doesn’t seem to have one perfect answer. We claim we are being honest with ourselves when it comes to doing something or being somebody, but most of the time we aren’t.

We’ve all heard it before, most successful people do the things, that other people won’t or don’t do. And honestly, that’s the truth.

Those individuals who acheive a goal aren’t more talented then you, or smarter then you. They are just more persistent and are honest with themselves about what they did to get there. Do you get this?

Keeping yourself on track with your goal in mind and doing the things required will eventually get you where you go. The question you have to ask yourself is, have you done what you were going to do? Or did you do it for three or five days and then give up? And then do you access blame to something because you didn’t do what you needed to?

I’ve had many people tell me that the company I work with, which happens to be in network marketing arena, doesn’t work. Guess what? The business plan works. The products work. You know who doesn’t work? You guessed it, those people don’t work. And if they were honest with themselves they would see where they failed themselves.

The same is true when it comes to eating. Over the years I have worked with many clients who want to lose weight. Believe me as a personal trainer and a life-long eating addict, I’ve heard and seen it all. These dieters swear this is the last time they are going to diet. But I can almost guarantee you that those dieters are not being honest with themselves with there eating.

Let’s be honest here. Nothing will work if you don’t put the time, effort and true passionate commitment into it.

Did you meet your spouse and not have to work at the relationship? Did you raise children and not have to teach them how to be kind and decent human beings? Did you have to educate yourself in a skill or task to be good at your job?  Be honest. You had to do something to make those things happen.

The best way to move forward is to take a good hard look at yourself. Look in the mirror and be honest.

If not, you know what you do to make it happen. It’s easier then you think.

 

 

Week 17 HJ – Connecting

Connections are so important in our lives. Actually it’s just about all the matters.

Isn’t it what we all desire as humans? And that is universally true to. Don’t believe me? Look at any society and at any income level and at any country in the world. What do we all have in common? What is the thing we desire most?

Connecting.

Most people think about connecting as a thing they need to do in business or in their personal relationships or networking. But it is so much more than that.  So let’s look at the definition of connecting is: joining or linking things together, especially so as to provide access and communication.

You see connecting is about communication. Communication becomes the way we connect.  Most people don’t get this simple concept or realize that the reason we connect in the first place is because we are connected. The communication or subject matter almost doesn’t matter.

Did you ever wonder why you sometimes get business? Or find a new employee? Or meet a new friend? It’s the connection. You either share a common bond or you are both looking for that true universal connection.

Wouldn’t you agree that sometimes opportunities or people just “fall into your lap?” It’s not chance, it’s because on some level you have connected and like a missle you are on target to meet on target.

So listen to that inner voice when it says to be true to yourself. It is actually your own authentic self guiding you. Too often we listen to others to guide us. And although these individuals are well-intentioned, they actually can keep you from moving forward in life and in business.

Start connecting with yourself and be honest with yourself. Then let the rest fall as it may. The connections are there and every other human being on this planet wants the same things you do. You see we are all the same and yet we are all beautiful individual and unique individuals.

Got some great connection stories? Post away my friends and let’s connect.

 

 

Week 17 – An Act of Kindess

Last week a group of us explored the idea and actually put into action, spreading kindness. Just by becoming aware of kindess that was given to us and then giving it to others we changed over 8,000 people’s week. Pretty amazing.

I have always made it my mission to spread kindness. Whether I was in a grocery store, putting a shopping cart back where it belongs or just telling someone thank you. Not only will this make you feel good all over (and we like those feelings), but it will make the person you are directing your action to, feel good too.

Somewhere along the way, we have forgotten to be kind.

What happened? It is like smiling. Did you know it takes more muscles to frown then it does to smile? So why aren’t we all smiling all the time? The same holds true for kindness. Being nice to someone on the telephone or in person is pretty darn easy. My experience has shown me “killing someone with kindness” works every time.

Think about those poor customer service folks. Chances are if you are contacting them, something has gone wrong for an order or a delivery. So what do we do? We take our irritation and frustrations out on another human being. Why? Because we are only looking at our own perspective. And there lies the key! Stop looking at you. Start looking at others and open your eyes. It’s amazing.

We all know people who spread their anger to the world. The one’s who are never satisfied with anything. The ones that we cower to ask the question, how was it? The ones where it is never good enough.

These unhappy individuals have forgotten how to be a human. Maybe circumstance or their upbringing or some dark event has happened in the life, but I still challenge you all to be kind.

A few years back, almost tody’s exact date, I was told about a major life-changing health challenge. It was not good news. But I took every day as one step, and actually made a point in the hospital and when I was testing to make someone else’s day better. These poor workers see sick, unhappy, frustrated and frightened people all day long. As someone who was in that position, I had a choice. Be the grumpy gal, or just take each day as it comes and let my sun shine.

Guess what? The sunshine won out.

So if today, or tomorrow or even next week you can be a bit kinder, I promise you will have a whole new perspective on life. You will feel happier and healthier. As a famous song said it, “sunshine, on my shoulders, makes me happy” Your sunshines is kindness and it’s a gift you can give for a lifetime.

Week 16 – Growing Up

Without growth in our life there is darkness. Growth is the thing that makes us be better at everything. Whether it’s being a better human being or learning how to get better at a skill. Growth matters.

I always said that if I could go back to college now and have the knowledge I have gained over the past 30+ years imagine how successful I would be? The reality is like anything in life, it takes time to grow up. And all those years of knowledge make us what we are today.

Some of us grow up faster and others never grow up. You know those individuals that never change, or are creatures of habits and they let their daily life lead them. I guess I never got that lesson. And I’m thankful I didn’t. If you stop growing, you stop really living.

All my life I have strived to be a better human being. Whether it’s being nicer, more polite, better at a still or learn something new. I never wanted to finish growing up. I always want to keep working at being a better version of me.

How many of you have given up on you?

If you have, give yourself a good kick in the pants and start trying again. It will mean you have to change those nasty habits that led you where you are. It will mean you will have to take a hard look in the mirror to see if you like you. It will mean you will have to define what your life will look like moving forward.

Growth is uncomfortable for us all. And most of us don’t like being uncomfortable. But if you really care about you, you will push through it and take a real hard look at you and start working again.

The mirror doesn’t lie. So don’t keep telling yourself you love what you see, if you don’t. Be honest with where you are, what you’ve done and where you are going?

If you do love yourself then give yourself a pat on the back and continue to love and grow each and every day.

Give love. Get love. Grow more.